SlantedScience

Mice. Cocky but cowardly little critters.

They will happily sit six feet from your sofa, munching on a piece of carelessly discarded pizza crust while staring you out. But make the slightest movement and they’re off, running for a hole in the wall somewhere behind the TV.

This we know, for we at one time lived in an apartment filled with university students.

But finally, scientists have harnessed the murine sense of smell for human good: boffins from Colorado and Pennsylvania are reporting that they have trained the tiny terrors to sniff bird turds, and differentiate between the normal and the flu-infected. So, WHOOT! for ducks, and OH, RIGHT… for us.

Let’s see what the hell is going on, after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »

These are strange times. On the one hand, mankind is photographing individual molecules, smashing space rockets into the moon and flinging together sub-atomic particles in the hope of observing the most fundamental units of our universe.

And on the other: they’re barring a guy from taking elected office in the USA because he doesn’t believe in gods.

Jesus, as they say, wept. Read the rest of this entry »

Great news for skinny guys! Scientists have used gene therapy to successfully increase the size and strength of lab monkeys’ muscles.

But calm down, stickboys: the intended use of this research is in treating degenerative muscular diseases. Better keep paying that gym subscription for a while longer yet. Read the rest of this entry »

We have a list of all the people we would go to for medical advice if we were struck down by some catastrophic illness.

Anybody at Johns Hopkins – right down to the janitorial staff – is at the top.

Our list then moves onto the Cleveland Clinic, the Mayo Clinic, and continues all the way down to the West Mississippi Regional Center For Acupuncture And Mystical Healing (great place, lovely people).

After that, the list gets a little more personal : next up is Dr Phil, then Dr Oz, then Dr Dre.

Thousands of entries later, after Charles Manson, after the guy who plays a one-stringed guitar at 3 in the morning in our neighborhood park, and after a bag of roasted peanuts, comes our very last resort for medical advice: Mr Ozzy Osbourne.

Well, it seems that we may need to rethink this list: a British newspaper has just hired the rock legend as its new health columnist.

What a shame. We had $5 on them hiring the guy who cleans tables at our local Olive Garden.

Read the rest of this entry »

Well, you’re in luck. Scientists have just announced their success in breeding a transgenic trout which boasts a set of chest and shoulder muscles that could see it making an appearance on the next season of Jersey Shore.

The only problem? Well, you just get out there with your rod and try reeling in one of these bastards. Read the rest of this entry »

Breaking news:SlantedScience has cocked itself up bigger than Amy Winehouse.

We’re as dumb as Paris Hilton, and twice as screwed.

Yes, we upgraded our site’s software without backing up all of its data beforehand. The site’s new software version somehow screwed us harder than a pornstar, and we have been left with this shattered shell of a website.

But don’t worry, because we will continue bringing you stories of science science and weird science, great science and bad science. Just without the huge archive of previous posts.

So, please, support us through this difficult time. Mock the hell out of us in the comments, but just assure us you’ll be back, eh?

With gratitude,
SlantedScience.com

Apologies to all, but we are having a bit of a cleanup. We will be back with you soon.

In the meantime, why not check out our sister site:

www.GoodNewsForBadPeople.com

See you soon!