Slanted Science

Copper bracelets. Gemstones.  Faith healing. Just three of the many ways in which medical conmen swindle money from from sick and desperate people. Well, it’s time to add another one to the list, except this time it’s multinationals who seem to have been selling us snakeoil. Thick, creamy, delicious snakeoil.

Yes, EU scientists have just declared that health claims made for probiotics (including yoghurts) can not be supported by their scientific studies. Damn you, science, and your reliance upon careful methodologies and repeatable results demonstrating effectiveness of claims made for a substance.

It was one of the most profitable scams of the last fifty years: promoting, packaging and selling bacteria as a healthfood. The theory ran thus: our digestive system has bacteria living in it which help us to digest certain foods. Furthermore, these benefical bacteria are supposed to protect us against disease-causing microorganisms, either by weight of numbers fighting for a limited nutrient supply, or by gobbling up the invaders.

Sadly for the charlatans marketing these things, the truth runs thus: yes, there are many species of bacteria which live in our intestines. No, swallowing a load of one or two of them will not magically populate our guts with some wonderful, healthful little organisms which are somehow able to fight off diseases, malnutrition, sadness, lethargy, and whatever the hell else the manufacturers claim.

The European Food Safety Agency – Europe’s regulatory body dealing with safety issues and medicinal-like claims – has tossed out all of 180 claims being made for probiotics. I am extremely happy to see such an agency making these kinds of rulings; now, can they please look closely at all the vitamins, micronutrients, and – PLEASE! – homeopathic nonsense out there.

One last note: I will provide a quote taken from The Independent. No further comment from me, just an invitation to you to consider carefully what may be going on here:

However Britain’s best-selling yogurt drinks, Actimel and Yakult, were excluded from Efsa’s findings yesterday because [the manufacturers] withdrew their claims before they could be scrutinised.

They have since re-submitted them, but the results will not be available until next year.

Don’t Hold Your Breath, But This May Lead To: the application of some critical, scientific thinking to the problem of food companies making unsubstantiated claims about their products’  healthful properties.