Archive for the ‘Laboratory Animals’ Category
Re-Post: Pork Chop Grown In A Lab; Paul McCartney Is “Confused”

We’re not sure why, but everybody is reporting today on the Dutch scientists who have created meat within a lab culture system. First as always, we reported this in November last year. So here’s a re-post for ya:
Great news for vegetarians who miss the taste of meat: in a few years, you may be able to chow down on a slice of bacon or two with a clean conscience. Scientists report today the first ever production of a piece of meat grown entirely in vitro.
Where next with this? May we suggest co-culturing a piece of pork with a pair of pigeon wings? Hey presto: flying pigs. Read the rest of this entry »
Bat Fellatio Update: Now With Video
Story Update!
We missed this previously, but feel compelled to bring you the video which accompanies our recent story about female bats giving their mates oral sex during intercourse, in order to keep his genes within her reach, rather than other females’. Read the rest of this entry »
Look At This: Hot Video Of Duck Penises Ejaculating!

Some scientists spend their days hunched over a lab bench, trying to find a cure for cancer. We honor them.
Some scientists work endless hours in front of computers, trying to decipher the mysteries of the universe. We respect them.
And some scientists use high-speed cameras to film duck penises shooting out of their owner’s body, corkscrewing down plastic tubes and then uselessly dribbling ejaculate into the air. We love them, and want them to keep doing this forevermore. Read the rest of this entry »
Army Scientist Is Infected With Lab-Caught Tularemia (Rabbit Fever)

Scientists at the United States Army Medical Research Institute of Infectious Diseases (USAMRIID) in Frederick, Maryland work with various nasty pathogens. They’re the kinds of bugs which, experts predict, would be likely candidates for biological terrorist attacks – anthrax, that sort of thing. Well, someone apparently didn’t follow the rigorous safe-handling procedures correctly, as one of the boffins has contracted a disease known as tularemia, or rabbit fever.
We do not believe the reports claiming that co-workers’ suspicions were first aroused when the researcher began ordering 50-lb bags of carrots delivered to their lab. Read the rest of this entry »
Being A Dirty Pig Is Good For Your Health
Great news for men! You always thought it was true, but now scientists have confirmed it: being a bit dirty, and not obsessing over the odd discarded pizza slice laying around for a few days, is good for your immune system.
Read on as we tell you about the research, and provide you with a scientifically approved message to cut out and hand to your wife or girlfriend next time she asks you to wash the dishes. Read the rest of this entry »
Scientists Cure Huntington’s Disease In Mice
Work carried out at several North American research institutes, and headed by Dr Stuart Lipton,has come up with a novel strategy for treating the terrible neurodegenerative condition called Huntington’s Disease (or Huntington’s Chorea).
They used a mouse model of the disease and found that, in the mice at least, disease progress can be halted by a drug currently being used to treat patients with Alzheimer’s. Read the rest of this entry »
Muting Myostatin Makes Musclebound Monkeys
Great news for skinny guys! Scientists have used gene therapy to successfully increase the size and strength of lab monkeys’ muscles.
But calm down, stickboys: the intended use of this research is in treating degenerative muscular diseases. Better keep paying that gym subscription for a while longer yet. Read the rest of this entry »
Alcoholic Fruit Flies Help Science. And Then Throw Up, Presumably
The wonderful artwork above is used courtesy of Eric Spitler. You should check him out at EricSpitler.com
Scientists have used that most faithful of laboratory animals – the fruit fly – to identify a number of genes involved in behaviors associated with drinking.
With all sincerity, we would like to offer ourselves up as volunteers to take this work into humans. We’re selfless like that.
Going Naked To Beat Cancer, Part Two: Nude Mice
If you arrived here after an internet search for ‘nude mice‘, then you’re either in need of psychiatric care, or else you’d like some more information on a very important laboratory animal. Or both.
Either way: welcome!
Our recent story, describing the significance of the naked mole rat in cancer research, reminded us of another example of nudity in this field. And so we give to you the nude mouse: over 40 years at the forefront of the race to develop new treatments for cancer and other diseases. Read the rest of this entry »



