Perverted French Scientists Use Visible Light To See Through Objects

by SlantedScientist October 9, 2010

Scientists are boasting that they have just discovered how to use visible light – not X-rays or any other region of the electromagnetic spectrum – to view an object behind an opaque screen. Important note: the scientists behind these experiments are French, which means that their “not-X-ray X-ray technology” will be used for one thing [...]

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City In North Carolina Bars Democratically Elected Official From Office For Being An Atheist

by SlantedScientist October 4, 2010

These are strange times. On the one hand, mankind is photographing individual molecules, smashing space rockets into the moon and flinging together sub-atomic particles in the hope of observing the most fundamental units of our universe. And on the other: they’re barring a guy from taking elected office in the USA because he doesn’t believe [...]

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YouTube Science Video: “Most Beautiful Girl In The Lab”

by SlantedScientist October 4, 2010

Attention anyone who has worked in a lab: do not watch this video without medical assistance on standby, as you are likely to choke to death on your own laughter. “Most Beautiful Girl In The Lab” is a wonderful 3-minute video in which your average laboratory spod sings his admiration for…well, read the title, dumbass. [...]

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Mice Smell Awful(ly Well): They’re Being Used To Smell Feces For Diseases

by SlantedScientist August 25, 2010

Mice. Cocky but cowardly little critters. They will happily sit six feet from your sofa, munching on a piece of carelessly discarded pizza crust while staring you out. But make the slightest movement and they’re off, running for a hole in the wall somewhere behind the TV. This we know, for we at one time [...]

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Muting Myostatin Makes Musclebound Monkeys

by SlantedScientist August 12, 2010

  Great news for skinny guys! Scientists have used gene therapy to successfully increase the size and strength of lab monkeys’ muscles. But calm down, stickboys: the intended use of this research is in treating degenerative muscular diseases. Better keep paying that gym subscription for a while longer yet. //

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Dr Ozzy? Newspaper Signs Ozzy Osbourne As Health Adviser

by SlantedScientist August 12, 2010

We have a list of all the people we would go to for medical advice if we were struck down by some catastrophic illness. Anybody at Johns Hopkins – right down to the janitorial staff – is at the top. Our list then moves onto the Cleveland Clinic, the Mayo Clinic, and continues all the [...]

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New Supertrout Set To Muscle Its Way Into Supermarkets

by SlantedScientist August 12, 2010

Are you a fan of fish? Maybe you love a nice smoked salmon, or Cajun-seasoned tilapia? But don’t you sometimes wish that instead of the thin and scrawny fillet in front of you there was a nice, thick slab of piscine flesh? Well, you’re in luck. Scientists have just announced their success in breeding a [...]

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Oh Crap. SlantedScience Screws Up, Fires People, Starts Again

by SlantedScientist August 12, 2010

Breaking news:SlantedScience has cocked itself up bigger than Amy Winehouse. We’re as dumb as Paris Hilton, and twice as screwed. Yes, we upgraded our site’s software without backing up all of its data beforehand. The site’s new software version somehow screwed us harder than a pornstar, and we have been left with this shattered shell [...]

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by SlantedScientist August 8, 2010

Apologies to all, but we are having a bit of a cleanup. We will be back with you soon. In the meantime, why not check out our sister site: www.GoodNewsForBadPeople.com See you soon! //

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